How many moms can relate to infographic?
I sure can. A day off from parenting, sleep, food and cleaning done by someone else, time alone, sex, a massage, a bottle of wine and a lumberjack. Call me 100% on board.
As a single mom the day off, time alone and sleep might top my list on any given day. In fact, one of my favourite mother’s days was spent watching playful spinner dolphins in the ocean on a beach on Maui by myself. It was the happiest time of my life, not because I was away from my kids, but because I got a break from duties and the chance to reconnect with myself. Once you’re a mother you never stop participating in that role, but sometimes it’s nice to take a break and reconnect with the other labels you use to define yourself. What I needed as a person all on my own were rediscovered during that trip.
Ever since I became a mom I had that deep sense of knowing and feeling that this is what I was meant to do and be. I’ve taken the role very seriously. I monitor the private life I’m entitled to have as well as the life I live right in front of them carefully to make sure that no matter what – publicly or privately, there are no deep dark secrets that I would be ashamed would come out and cause them to question my values, morals, or character. There is no ‘out of sight out of mind’ when it comes to this job for me. So far… as a result of my actions being consistent with my words, they know I am kind, thoughtful, smart, courageous, hard working, determined, perseverant, and conscientious. They know that I always try to do the right thing. They also know that I am flawed and human. They have seen me fail. They’ve witnessed me grieve, cry and feel hopeless.
They have not seen a superhero, they have seen mistakes and poor judgment. In that they have seen me apologize and ask for forgiveness – especially from them. They have seen me crash and burn from bad choices and then pick myself up, dust off, and get on with life again. There has been teaching and humility throughout all of that. If nothing else, I hope that love all of the good and accept all of the bad, and love the whole of me. The greatest lesson I could teach them is how to love in this way. It has not been something they have witnessed from a partner or spouse, they don’t have a father that’s alive that demonstrated this for them in life or death, and so it’s my job to at least teach this in the only way I know how. To live it.
I celebrate great moms today. I have a family legacy of great mothers that I appreciate and have learned from. But I also know that today can be painful for those without mothers, without great mothers, who have lost their mothers, or who have not had the opportunity to become mothers if they so wanted to… and to you I hope that you find peace in your own way today in spite of painful circumstances and that you are able to draw on love from other mothers who are there to give it.
For the rest, I hope you get whatever is in your personal infographic pie chart … including a lumberjack if you so desire. I won’t get the whole pie today but I’ll appreciate the slices I get and continue on, as many moms do, just doing the very best we can at any given moment, with lousy financial rewards but with an abundance of all sorts of other priceless benefits.
